Newbies

Sorry to be dicks but... one of our rules (that we DO break once in a while) is to NOT play with newbies. Sorry, but some of our worst all time experiences have been with newbies.

Newbies are so tough. They can look so tempting because they can be so enthusiastic. To be honest a couple of our best times ever have been with newbies because of this. It's all new to them and so exciting. That excitement can rub off and be contagious.

but...

Newbies can also be a disaster. We've played with the newbie couple before where they seemed totally into it but once the clothes come off they've freaked out. I've never had anyone get physical with me but I've gotten some really ugly looks as I've started to fuck a guy's wife, and it's hitting him that he thought this might be fun, but now he's only jealous. We've seen tears and arguments and couples literally running out of the building screaming at each other half naked and that just isn't fun. In fact it really sucks.

The other huge problem is performance anxiety for men the first time they play in a group setting. I think some het guys freak out when there is a nice hard penis only a few feet away from them for the first time in their lives in a sexual situation. Some guys just simply get overwhelmed. They might very well be into it, but the whole experience is just too much for them that first time. So they can't get it up. This is all perfectly natural but it's still a drag.

We were meeting a newbie couple a few years ago and before we met I talked to Maria about this. Should we talk about it before we start to play? Let the other couple know that we know about this problem, that's it normal and natural, and to not worry about it? Maria and I agreed that it probably wouldn't be a good idea. Just planting the seed might make the guy think about it too much and then...

So we didn't say a word and sure enough the guy couldn't get it up, felt terrible about it, and it was a bad night once again.

So we've decided to just not bother anymore. Sorry newbies. But we also see lots of profiles from couples that say they love to get together with newbies. So we figure the newbies can play with those couples first. Have fun! Figure out if this lifestyle is right for you. Then we'll play with you. :-)